in case of nuclear fallout, we're covered.

i came home from work today to find a big brown package sitting on the porch. it was addressed to the jew. like all the other packages of hers that i drag into the house, i dragged this one in as well (dragged? drug? i'm not sure). the jew was sleeping on the couch & i not-so-quietly plopped the thing on the table. after a few groggy moments she jumped up like a kid on christmas (not a jewish kid, but ya know, a christmas celebratin' one) and began to open the box.

jew: "you're going to laugh when you see what's in here."
gypsy: "buy one get one 1/2 off from drugstore.com?" (total inside joke that i'm too lazy to see if i mentioned on here & link back to)
jew: "haha. no."

she opened the box.

this is what it contained:


gypsy: "are we opening a day care?"
jew: ".....no."

yes, that's right, 80 fruit snacks. they are, apparently, fat free. and she, the jew, is apparently, addicted to them. (as i type this, she's moving the box to the counter, very gingerly & with much love, i must say.)

i'm thinking that should a case of Pop Tarts arrive ('smores flavor only, of course) i will be concerned that the jew is half way to packing up a bunch of notebooks & heading to a cabin in west virginia with a gun rack in the back of her civic. then, when she's gone all conspiracy nutted & is sending unlabeled packages across the country, i can look back and say it all started with 80 bags of 100% fruit juice chewiness....